2010

I CLAIM THE FIRST POST OF THE YEAR BECAUSE JACQUELINE LIU HAS VIRTUALLY ABANDONED ANOREXIC TURTLE

just kidding, we both kind of did.

Anyway, I guess I better make the typical new years resolution post.

looking back, here's last year's:
1. Get license
2. Never miss appointments
3. Use planner
4. Maximum of 2 hours for games per day
5. Don't borrow money
6. Stop depending on Jon Stewart for the news
7. Work out.
8. Follow to-do lists and self-made schedules
9. only 1 tardy per week
10. Suit up

It's really funny that the only thing I really succeeded in was number 1. And that took a lot more effort than it needed.

A lot of things happened in 2009 and things turned out the way I never imagined them to. Did I see myself spoiling away in Berkeley, depending on a biosphere class to keep from failing out of school? Or getting Charizard? Or being homeless? No. But overall, I've had a great year. And now, despite the hard times and the regrets, I can only look forward to a new year, a new beginning, a new life...

All I can say is, I can't wait to see what 2010 has in store for me.

1. find a major.
2. make myself proud.
3. wear color.

that's basically everything on my mind for now... the rest, well, the specifics will figure themselves out.

happy new years, anorexic turtle. wish me luck

neener neener

I LOVE GOOGLE CHROME

Snapshot

Yesterday, I did laundry. And all day, I told people I did laundary. How embarrassing. The point is, I did laundry and all my clothes shrank. I also realized I only wear sold colored v-neck tshirts. I realized this when Kelly, my roommate, was like "Rachel, do you basically wear only solid color v-necks?" And I looked at my hands as I stacked my laundered shirts into my drawer, saw the three fruit of the loom white tees in one hand and 4 Hanes white tees in the other and thought, yeah. I do. And then she said "You're boring" and I probably called her a bitch because that is how I roll.

Speaking of which

I peed 5 times in 2 hours!

note the time on this thing! it'll blow your mind. not really if you really know me.

no, I'm not up early. I'm up really late.

there's nothing worse than being kicked out of your own room when you want to study for a midterm about your own race. that you know you're going to fail. which just makes a sad life even sadder. because it's like rachel, how hard can it be to learn about asian people?

asian people are so complicated you actually have no idea how hard it can actually be to learn about them.

I'm back to my radiohead phase too. this means my life is getting sadder and sadder and that I contemplate suicide more than I used to. HAHA okay not that extreme. never suicide... maybe something like idk, failing out or like just going to bed and never waking up shit like that you know?

My body is exhausted

dedicated to jerrie

On cloud nine, the heart-stopping anxiety dulls. Now it's smothered like a bruise. I don't know why Jerrie told me to do this but I was excited by the fact that someone will be reading this. So yeeeeeeah enjoy this as you laugh at me from the hallway and give me those JUDGMENT EYES and make me feel bad because you also once called me fat.

"I'm ready" -Thom Yorke

Radiohead is by far the best essay writing music. Not trance.

I found out a few days ago that I am a light fanatic. Because it "juxtaposes the darkness of my heart"

Horrid thought, no! not here!

Your honky gramma be trippin'

This was a very interesting experience, Jerrie. There are undiscovered patches in the mind that kind of spill all over the place.

But yes, I do worry for myself at times like this. At the point of no return, the tipping point, the four corners ( I made that last one up ) When I dream I only dream of the future. which just saddens me when I wake up. doesn't that suck.

the saddest day of my life

i need a lifestyle change

that party last night

today will be about college.

college is not doing me much good. it is accentuating all my bad habits and making me even lazier than i was (if that's even possible.)

however, i'm also doing a lot of breaking out of the comfort zone and experiencing new things.

I also do a lot of missing and random nostalging and reminiscing and sighing

however, I am also meeting new people, getting closer to people, and learning stories of these people's epic lives.

all in all, college for me has been a mixed bag. it's great, i'm having fun, but at times stifling. I know right, i'm set out into the world of independence but sometimes the freedom is stifling. i need to be grounded.